graveyard1 Death and taxes, nothing more sure in life than that!
graveyard2 The people here aren't paying up! They are better off dead! Oh, perhaps they already are.
windy1 Just because your house blows down, doesn't mean you stop paying taxes!
windy2 Bah! If this wind keeps up, people will lose their precious possessions and stop paying me!
storm1 A marvelous storm! A remarkable storm!
storm2 I am as giddy as a drunken man! I love this weather!
rain1 Humbug! Someone tried to tell me they saw a fish walking on land. Who do they take ME for?!
rain2 Why can't it be raining gold coins!? Water is everywhere! Bah, how useless!